Every Monday afternoon I wade through the celebrity news, searching tirelessly for something other than Britney Spears. Girlfriend can’t even color her hair Skank Black without causing a stir. What I need is for someone else to get pregnant, posthaste.
Someone like Assica Simpson.
Wouldn’t it be great fun to witness her questioning the ingredients of Gerber Peas baby food? Watch Jo Simpson watching her breastfeed.
Or, Jennifer Lopez.
The fun it would be to watch her hips EXPLODE. You know, hips don’t lie.
There’s always hope that Star Jones still has the ability to get pregnant.
Surely she has a uterus to go with that tiara.
And, glory be the day that Nicole Richie gets pregnant.
Wouldn’t that be “sexy”? Wouldn’t that be “hot”? Wouldn’t you “love it”? Her baby would be the youngest child ever to have hair extensions that match the dog and the mother.
But, really, the bankroll would be Tara Reid.
Just imagine this sparkler-in-the-mouth technique at the next Mommy and Me Playgroup. I’d have my kid avoid her kid’s sippy cup, for sure.
Which celebrity do you think will provide the most parenting snark fun when they become parents?
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