Kristin: June 2011 Archives

Ryan Dunn, RIP, "star" of the Jackass film franchise and, according to Wikipedia, best known for shoving a Hot Wheel car up his ass, was killed, along with his passenger, early yesterday morning when the car he was driving crashed. Alcohol is suspected as just hours earlier Dunn was tweeting photos of himself out cocktailing with friends...

Roger Ebert, movie critic turned pithy tweeter, took the Internet yesterday to say this:

"I just lost my best friend, I have been crying hysterical for a full day and piece of s*it roger ebert has the gall to put in his 2 cents about a jackass drunk driving and [he] is one, f*ck you! Millions of people are crying right now, shut your fat f*cking mouth!"

Well, Bam, while sorry for your loss, Mamarazzi would really like to point out, as we stare at the flattened and charred piece of metal which once was a car, is that this was a 100% preventable tragedy. While you and "millions" of others might be crying "hysterical", shed some tears on the fact that this didn't have to happen.

Jackass.

In 1924, the Chicago based Marshall Field's Department Store, introduced the very first wedding registry allowing newly engaged couples to choose the china, crystal and silver with which they wished to start their married life. It's a win-win solution, especially for young couples who may have little more than plastic slurpee cups and beach towels.

Mamarazzi loves a gift registy. It makes life for everyone involved easier and if a bride feels that she must have a punch bowl set, or a stand mixer, or special BBQ tools, who are we to deny her? A good and thoughtful registry will also have a range of price points enabling both broke roommates and wealthy grandparents to hit a home run.

However, what about those rare couples for whom money is no object? Just what to get a couple of multi-millionaires for their sham wedding?

Well wonder no more as Kim Kardashian and her intended, Kris Humphries, have helpfully set up a Wedding Registry at Gearys and for a mere $6,500, you can buy them this Lalique vase:

or, if you are one of The Poors, you can buy the never going to make their first anniversary future Mr. and Mrs. Humphries this bargain priced Baccarat candy jar:

Click here for a full listing of the reality star and basketball player's desires... Mamarazzi hopes that if they do indeed receive their full set of wedding china ($5,400 for the plates alone) that they remember that everyday can be a special occasion...

Mamarazzi is busy spiking the coffee with whiskey... between our college degrees gathering dust as Snooki allegedly inks a six figure per episode deal for the next season of The Jersey Shore and our eyes burning from another tragic idiot baring his action via webcam, this week begs for less Internet and more liquor.

Which is why today's post is being outsourced: this article from Jezebel hits it right on the weiner nose.

Could it be that the most famous Kardashian of them all is wearing a recycled/Reggie Bush didn't pop the question/ engagement ring?

Unless you have been under a rock (and Lordy, sometimes Mamarazzi thinks that is the place to be) you know that Kris Humphries (a basketball player? Playah?) proposed to Kim Kardashian last week in a total surprise moment that was witnessed by only the two of them and People magazine...

Kim has taken to Twitter and websites and tabloids to tell the world that it is the most perfect and prettiest (and even bigger than Khloe's) ring ever; it's her dream ring.

Gag.

But wait? The downside of being photographed every single time you leave the house is that the media is able to look at your stamp sized bauble and think....hmmmmm, looks familiar.

And then they dig into their archives and volia! Photos of you wearing what appears to be the very same ring appear and suddenly, as Ricky Ricardo best said, you've got some splainin' to do.

So what do you think lovely readers? Has our Kim had the ring in her nightstand just waiting for the right suckah guy and if so does it really matter? After all, this way, when the marriage goes up in flames 18 months after the vows (Mamarazzi is taking odds) she can just tuck that monster away until next time....