Recently in Denise Richards Category

Denise Richards has opened her mouth again...

... and said something that is probably going to come back to bite her in the ass at some point in the future.

She recently told Globe magazine that, rather than dating guys and getting to know them, she instead checks into hotels for no-strings-attached sex. She says:

You don't want to bring them home to your house, but I have certain needs. Friends with benefits are awesome. I used to be like, 'Oh no, you have to be in a relationship.' But after going through a divorce, I'm like, 'Life is short, I wanna have a good time.'

The Mamas can't decide if Denise is actually on to something here or is truly as stupid as she sounds.

What do YOU think? Brilliant plan or dumb ass idea?

Both photos courtesy of Yahoo Images.

Denise Richards just can't catch a break... it started fine, all those years ago, when she was a Hot Young Thing and thus, a Bond Girl (a nuclear physicist no less!) and, for a short while, all was well as she continued to romp her way through Hollywood in various and sundry sex kitten roles... but then she made a supreme error in judgment and married Charlie Sheen and sure, while it was all love and stuff for 5 minutes, and they had a cute child, she ended up filing for divorce while 7 months pregnant with the second child of that union, and, um, that would seem to indicate things suck pretty damn badly (Hookers, anyone?).

Well, Charlie bounced back with an awful but for reasons not understood by Mamarazzi incredibly popular sitcom, a new bride (sort of a poor man's Denise Richards in the looks department) and shiny twin boys, while Denise has simply been on a downward spiral of humiliating reality shows, awkward Dancing With the Not Really Stars and now, this:

Denise, for what it's worth, a lot of people are quite drunk by the 7th inning stretch so this may have gone unnoticed by the folks in the stands...

Today's Mamarazzi is brought to you by the letter "C".

"C" is for complicated

"C" is for Charlie

and "C" is for c*nt.

Although we at Mamarazzi typically believe the use of extreme potty language is merely an indicator of weak vocabulary skills, in this case, we think Denise may have had a point...

*this scene is from Denise Richard's new reality show on E!, It's Complicated... she is trying to "talk" to an editor at People magazine about some of the sarticles they have printed about her and, finding herself being dismissed by said editor, losing her cool and calling her a c*nt.

Yes, we realize we're being unimaginative and posting about Denice Richards twice in two days.

What can we say? We've missed her.

Also we can't resist airing this clip from The View, for those of you who didn't catch it live. Watch this and see how Denise justifies including her chldren in her reality show.

See? There's no reason to snark her. She's only doing it because her mother, who died of cancer, wanted her to do it. She's not a rotten mother. She's a wonderful daughter.

p.s. Oh hai. We're still working on the comments glitch. In the meantime, feel free to snark Denise anywhere else you want.

Good grief, it’s been over three years since Denise Richards filed for divorce from Charlie Sheen and they’re STILL bickering to anybody who will put up with their nonsense.

They had a highly dysfunctional three year marriage. But being the overachievers that they are, they're extending and inflating the craziness to levels that may never be matched even by The Lohans or Amy Winehouse and Blaaaaaaaake!

Denise has two current projects:

1. An very public and seemingly endless disagreement over an alleged email claiming that she wants Charlie’s sperm to father her third child, and

2. A new reality show, It’s Complicated, premiering May 26 on E!

Eeeeeeeeeeeeeee!!!

Now, we Mamarazzi Mamas aren’t judgmental, of course. Nevertheless, we have a few opinions on what’s complicated and what’s considerably simpler.

Complicated: Writing bizarre emails requesting a sperm donation from ex-husband Charlie. This applies to whomever wrote them. Charlie and New Girlfriend, you’re not in the clear here!

Simpler: Accepting that your ex is indeed your ex. It’s over.

Complicated: Making a reality show that’s interesting if you don’t work and don’t want to look dopey and shallow.

Simpler: Using your exceptional good looks, money and contacts to build a new life. With a rich, famous man.

Complicated: Claiming that you’re poor when you receive $600,000 – tax free - per year in child support.

WAY MORE Complicated: Being a typical divorced mom of two, receiving little or no child support, trying to make ends meet with an ordinary job, paying for child care when you can’t be with your kids AND having a life of your own - ZZZZING!

SPECIAL NOTE! If our comments STILL aren't working (we do have someone trying to fix the problem), send your comments to SarahO, Poppy or Kristin. WE MISS YOUR SNARKS!

Photo credits: Top, unknown Bottom, Playboy

This year to aid you in your Halloweenness, Mamarazzi has combed the celebrity archives to put together a celebrity costume guide. (No treats necessary!)

Celin Dion as Last Square of Toilet Paper Stuck on the Roll

Mary Kate and Ashely Olsen as Vampire Zombies, Bob Saget as Priest Who Loves Children a Little Too Much.

Denise Richards as Britney Past

Sarah Silverman as Britney Present

Courtney Love as Britney Future

Britney as Sexy Librarian Minus Books and Sexy

Katie Holmes in festive Tablecloth and Tree Topper ensemble

Tara Reid as a Birthday Cupcake with Sprinkles and Bourbon

Victoria Beckham as Jane Jetson

Victoria Beckham in Jane Jetson After Hours (George Out of Town) version

Victoria Beckham as Crime Scene Swiffer

Gisele Bundchen as Tall, Cool Glass of Water

Now, we at Mamarazzi are no fans of Denise Richards (although we may secretly covet her thighs) because hooking up with your friend's man is just a big ol' taboo no-no and is the type of move that could get your ass drummed right out of the YaYa Sisterhood. We look for justice in these situations and sort of wish that we had the power to levy fines and banishment upon any and all whorish behavior.

But, judging from this photo, and the look of pure pain on Richie's face... a look that says, "Dammit, you let me fall asleep in the sun and now you won't let go of my arm" and we happily realize that karma is busy doing what it does best and that is met out divine retribution... the bloat, the mullet, the burn, the facial expression..

Somewhere, Heather Locklear is smiling.

I am the first to admit that, at times, I can be small, petty and quite possibly mean spirited...

That being said, this picture? The whole rode-hard-put-away-wet thing? Makes every woman I know look a damn beauty queen.

There is a reason they usually wear sunglasses...

Denise Richard and daughter Sam teamed up to create a pictoral of the five stages of potty training.

Stage One: Denial
"You can wait. You're a big girl!"

Stage Two: Anger
"You CAN hold it, can't you?! Dammit,
Sammie, we were just by a bathroom! DO NOT GO NOW! Jesus you look like your dad when you turn your head like that. WHY DO YOU HAVE TO LOOK SO MUCH LIKE YOUR FATHER?!"

Stage Three: Bargaining
"Hey, photographers! Look cute and hold it and we'll go to Disney with Uncle Richie this weekend!"

Stage Four: Depression
"My career is circling the drain, I'm dating a puffy has-been, and my ex-husband's clone just crapped on my favorite jeans. Everything in my life is shit."

Stage Five: Acceptance
"Let's go home and get cleaned up. Once it gets dark out, we'll stick these gross clothes under that bitch Heather's car."

Celebrity moms are just like the rest of us. When gas prices zoom skyward,

they make the adjustments necessary to keep within a weekly budget.