It's been a long time since we opened a Mad magazine. After all, we're not exactly their target demographic.
But when we heard that they picked the canonization of Michael Jackson as the Number 1 Stupid Thing of 2009, we had to take a peek. And this is what we saw.
Saint Michael of Neverland
Son of Joseph, Heavenly Moonwalker
Thou shalt be remembered always as the singer of songs--the dancer of dances--
and not as the changer of noses, the dangler of infants, the toucher of children.
For thou hast proclaimed thineself the King of Pop--
and thou shalt be remembered thusly.
May all who forsake you suffer a fate worse than Tito's solo career,
for thine life will be everlasting through the endless reissuing and
exploitation of thine earthly works. Amen. Shamon.
So tell us. Funny? Or two very sequined thumbs down?
All that and nothing about the crotch-grab?