Despite the usual worthy competition, Balloon Dad Richard Heene wins Mamarazzi's BAD DAD o' the Week award.
How did Balloon Dad outpace all the other highly qualified celebs? Was it:
- His need to be a fixture on the particularly cheesy reality TV circuit? Gracious no. Reality is the new fiction!
- All the stuff you already know about that not only endangers his kids but worse, makes them wither in shame? Dreadful, but not enough to impress our jaded souls.
- His cringe-inducing would-be reality show jingle? Pretty good, we're embarrassed and he's not even our dad. But this still isn't enough to beat this weeks competition.
- The Psyience Detective videos in which he tried to warn us about the 2012 apocalypse and the "reptilian agenda" - the idea there are alien beings that walk among us and are shape shifters, able to resemble human beings and running the upper echelon of our government? Sure, it's humiliating for the kids but then again, that kind of thinking's all too common. Yawn.
We judge Balloon Dad harshly because of this stellar performance: You know, the one in which that little Hell on training wheels Falcon totally busts his dad?
We are horrified.
Balloon Dad is a bad dad because obviously, any decent father of three knows that six-year olds suck at memorizing their lines.
Photos: AP photos
If only I had a good place to put a sig line! "Reality is the new fiction" is the best. sig. line. EVER. !!!
And before I click on it, is that last video the puke-fest? Because if it is, I don't think I can deal.