Then clap your hands!
And we do mean clap. In every sense of the word. Because rumor has it you will soon be able to see Disney's live-action version of Peter Pan, which according to reports all over the internet--will include Paris Hilton in the role of Tinkerbell.
Mind you, we don't believe everything we read on the internet. Hello? We're internet rumor-mongers and conspiracy theorists ourselves. It's what we do.
So we hope this is a stupid, baseless rumor. Because we'd rather take our impressionable daughters to a version of Peter Pan starring the Bratz than expose them to any more of Paris Hilton than is absolutely necessary. We are not enjoying the visions we're having of Target racks bulging with size 4T Paris Hilton-as-Tinkerbell nightgowns.
In the meantime, we wish Paris well in her campaign against licorice Apartheid.
Disney executives were especially impressed by this performance art piece, in which Paris showed her support for oppressed black licorice everywhere by singing protest Karaoke songs against red Twizzlers.
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Do you agree that this might be the skeeviest idea Disney ever came up with? Or are we being all judgey-judgmental again? Comment here.
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